Library guides: Tips for carers self-care: Content

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Practical support

Seek out practical support

Caring for a person with dementia can be rewarding and challenging. It is important to give yourself permission to reach out and accept help.

Discrimination and dementia – enough is enough by Dementia Australia
Dementia Action Week Report 2021
For all the increased recognition of human rights over the past decades and the United Nations Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities coming into force, people living with dementia still report experiencing discrimination and not feeling fully included within society. The Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities affirms that all persons with all types of disabilities (including people living with dementia) must enjoy the same rights as everyone else, including rights to autonomy in decision-making, independent living, community inclusion, and liberty. The challenge, however, is to shift attitudes, and design and deliver services, businesses and infrastructure that are flexible, innovative, accessible, appropriate and culturally safe to ensure people with dementia, their families and carers are well supported and included within the Australian community.
When a Family Member Has Dementia - Steps to Becoming a Resilient Caregiver by Susan M. McCurry; Linda Teri (Foreword by)
Publication Date: 2006
Caring for a person with dementia is a difficult and often , overwhelming task. In addition to the inevitable decline in memory and physical function, most people living with dementia develop one or more changed behaviours. These changes can be highly idiosyncratic. No two patients are alike, and interventions that work well with one person are often ineffective with another. Caregivers often become stuck: either unable to figure out how best to help their loved one, or unable to consistently implement positive practices they know would improve their situation. This book offers caregivers a set of practical and flexible tools to enable them become more resilient in the face of difficulty and change.
The 36-Hour Day, 6th Edition AUDIOBOOK by Nancy L. Mace; Peter V. Rabins; Christina Moore (Narrated by)
Publication Date: 2019-02-01
This book will help family members and caregivers address these challenges and simultaneously cope with their own emotions and needs. Featuring useful takeaway messages and informed by recent research into the causes of and the search for therapies to prevent or cure dementia, devices to make life simpler and safer for people who have dementia : strategies for delaying behavioral and neuropsychiatric symptoms : support groups for caregivers, friends, and family members : The central idea underlying the book—that much can be done to improve the lives of people with dementia and of those caring for them remains the same.

Emotional support

Seek out emotional support

It is important to find people who are there for you, to listen without judgement and provide support.

National Dementia Helpline
Free and confidential, the National Dementia Helpline provides expert information, advice and support, 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year. No issue too big, no question too small.

Five Good Minutes : 100 Morning Practices to Help You Stay Calm and Focused All Day Long by Jeffrey Brantley; Wendy Millstine
Publication Date: 2005
The 100 simple practices found in Five Good Minutes® are designed to help even the busiest person start the day right. Using just five minutes of mindfulness, relaxation, or imagery techniques during their morning routines, readers can set their intentions and greet the day feeling calm, centered, and energized.

Be informed

Learn more about dementia to prepare for the future

It’s okay to not know what to do sometimes. Carers do not magically have all the answers.

Learn about dementia
Explore information on types of dementia, living with dementia, and treatment and management.

The Dementia Guide by Dementia Australia
Publication Date: 2022
For people living with dementia, their families and carers. The Dementia Guide is an important resource for any person impacted by any form of dementia, of any age. The Guide contains information about the impact dementia may have on a person, the treatment, support and services they may need.
The 4th edition of this guide is now available to read online, download a pdf, listen to an audio version or request a print copy.
Letting go without giving up : continuing to care for the person with dementia
The idea for Letting go without giving up grew from concerns expressed by carers who felt they were no longer allowed to have a role in caring for the person they had looked after at home after the person entered long-stay care. This booklet is aimed at carers who want to continue their involvement in the lives of the people they have cared for, even if they are no longer responsible for their day-to-day physical care needs.
Atomic Habits by James Clear
Publication Date: 2018
In this ground-breaking book, Clears reveals exactly how these minuscule changes can grow into such life-altering outcomes. He uncovers a handful of simple life hacks (the forgotten art of Habit Stacking, the unexpected power of the Two Minute Rule, or the trick to entering the Goldilocks Zone), and delves into cutting-edge psychology and neuroscience to explain why they matter.

Take time out

Take time out for things you love to do and the other people you love to spend time with

It is important to find or maintain activities that feel like something you do just for yourself.

Self care for carers
It’s okay to spend time taking care of yourself. Not only because you’ll be better able to care for your loved one, but just because you’re a person who deserves care.

The Complete Guide to Self Care Best Practices for a Healthier and Happier You by Kiki Ely
Publication Date: 2020
The Complete Guide to Self-Care helps you identify your needs so you can relax, refuel, and find calm in your hectic life:
• Setting an effective and fruitful sleep schedule
• Creating exercise routines and not feeling bad about falling off the bike
• Saying no to things you don't want to do (and things that maybe you do but don't have space for)
• Reading, writing, art, music, and all forms of expression that water our soul
• Setting aside time that is only for you, no one else, no exceptions
Just One Thing by Rick Hanson
Publication Date: 2011
Research has shown that integrating little daily practices into your life can actually change the way your brain works.
This guide offers simple things you can do routinely, mainly inside your mind, that will support and increase your sense of security and worth, resilience, effectiveness, well-being, insight, and inner peace. For example, they include: taking in the good, protecting your brain, feeling safer, relaxing anxiety about imperfection, not knowing, enjoying your hands, taking refuge, and filling the hole in your heart. At first glance, you may be tempted to underestimate the power of these seemingly simple practices. But they will gradually change your brain through what's called experience-dependent neuroplasticity.
The Power of Writing It Down by Allison Fallon
Publication Date: 2021-01-12
For anyone who's trying to make sense of their life, who wants to get unstuck from the patterns that hold them back, hear this incredible news: everything you need for the freedom you want is entirely within reach. This practice and pathway is free, it's readily available every day of your life, it takes just minutes of your time, and anyone can do it.
As it turns out, using your words is one of the most powerful means you have for unlocking your life.
• Identify your ruts and create new neurological grooves toward better habits
• Find fresh motivation and take ownership of your life
• Heal from past pain and trauma
• Relieve anxiety and depression
• Contextualize life's setbacks and minor frustrations
• Live a more confident, balanced, and healthy life
Five Good Minutes with the One You Love by Jeffrey Brantley; Wendy Millstine
Publication Date: 2008
When you first fall in love, every moment you spend with that special someone feels like a lifetime. But as time goes by, let's face it, relationships change. It takes practice to remain deeply connected and truly intimate with someone—but it doesn't need to take up all of your free time. With the simple practices in this book, you'll be able to really connect with your special someone in just five minutes a day.

Using simple techniques drawn from mindfulness practice, each of these intimate and fun activities will help you feel closer, more connected, and more deeply in love with your partner. The meditations, affirmations, and observations you'll find here will foster gratitude, trust, empathy, and loving kindness. Use them to get closer to the one you love, and watch as the benefits of mindfulness grow to fill your relationship with renewed romance, harmony, and joy.

Physical health

Finding time for your own physical health

As a carer, making time for regular exercise and physical activity can be tricky. See if you can regularly prioritise gardening, walking together or other little things that help promote an active lifestyle.

Health direct - How to start exercising
Everyone should aim for at least 30 minutes of moderate-intensity activity on most, preferably all, days of the week. Moderate-intensity physical activity is an activity that is energetic and raises your heart rate, but doesn't make you too breathless, such as fast walking.
Build up slowly...
more...less...
Some physical activity is better than none, and more is better than a little. But you don’t have to exercise to the point of being in pain to get a health benefit.

If you don’t do any physical activity at all, start by just doing some. You can build up gradually.

It can be a good idea to set short-term and long-term goals. Make your goals specific, measurable and achievable. Rather than a vague goal like 'I will get fit', try 'I will walk every day for 10 minutes after meals' or 'I will get on and off the bus/train 2 stops away from my usual stop'.

Workout to Go A Sample Exercise Routine from the National Institute on Aging
Publication Date: 2016
The 13 exercises in this sample workout can help. In this booklet, you'll find easy-to-follow strength, balance, and flexibility exercises that you can do anytime, anywhere.
T'ai Chi for Seniors by Philip Bonifonte
Publication Date: 2004-01-01
This book gives you all the information you need to undertake a safe, health-improving exercise regimen. These ancient Chinese exercises are fun and low impact and help to alleviate the pains of arthritis, fibromyalgia, carpal tunnel syndrome, and many other "senior" diseases. Plus, methods outlined in this guide can be performed standing or seated with no previous experience necessary, and taking into consideration limited range of movement.

Stay safe

Take steps to avoid physical injury when caring for your loved one

If you have to move or lift the person you are caring for, seek advice from your doctor or an allied health professional to reduce your risk of injury.

Aging with Agency: Building Resilience, Confronting Challenges, and Navigating Eldercare by Sandi Peters
Publication Date: 2020
Sandi Peters shows us that growing older need not mean the end of personal growth. In fact, late adulthood can prove to be the most meaningful and transformative period of one's life. The key, says Peters, is the development of one's inner life, and with it a shift in one's relation to the aging process.
Qigong for Wellbeing in Dementia and Aging by Stephen Rath
Publication Date: 2015
Qigong is the centuries-old practice of moving vital energy (Qi) through the channels of the body, known as meridians, to promote vitality and health. Stephen Rath details current research and Traditional Chinese Medicine theory to show how Qigong practice can support cognitive functioning, as well as emotional and physical wellbeing, in people with dementia.
Maggie's recipes for life by Maggie Beer and Ralph Martins
Publication Date: 2017
Maggie Beer and leading Alzheimer's researcher Professor Ralph Martins have teamed up to provide the steps to maintain a heathy brain - by optimising the goodness in the food you eat every day and making some real lifestyle changes such as increasing regular exercise and mental activity.

Ask for help

Talk to friends and family regularly about the type of support you need

As with seeking emotional support, give yourself permission to ask for and accept help when you feel you need it. Try to involve family members, friends and professionals and share responsibilities. This will take some of the pressure off you.

Taking care of a carer
Information on how to support someone who cares for a person with dementia.
Self-care for carers by Dementia Australia
This page discusses the importance of taking a break from caring, how to organise it and who can help. Caring for someone with dementia can be physically and emotionally tiring and stressful. Families and carers can easily become isolated from social contacts, particularly if they are unable to leave the person they are caring for. Regular breaks mean that you can have a rest, go out, attend to business or go on a holiday.
Dementia - Support for Family and Friends by Dave Pulsford; Rachel Thompson
Publication Date: 2012
For friends, family members and carers of people with dementia, understanding the condition and coping with the impact it has on their lives can be extremely challenging. This book, written specifically for these groups, explores each stage of the "journey with dementia" and explains not only how it will affect the person with the condition, but also those around them, and how best to offer support and where to get professional and informal assistance. It focuses on the progressive nature of dementia and the issues that can arise as a result, and gives practical advice that can help to ensure the best possible quality of life both for the person with dementia and the people around them.
Keeping Love Alive As Memories Fade by Gary D. Chapman; Edward G. Shaw; Deborah Barr
Publication Date: 2016
At its heart, this book is about how love gently lifts a corner of dementia’s dark curtain to cultivate an emotional connection amid memory loss. This collaborative work between a healthcare professional, caregiver, and relationship expert will: provide an overview of the love languages and Alzheimer’s disease; correlate the love languages with the developments of the stages of AD; discuss how both the caregiver and care receiver can apply the love languages; address the challenges and stresses of the caregiver journey; and offer personal stories and case studies about maintaining emotional intimacy amidst AD.

Related library guides

Explore our library guides below for further resources and information