Topic guides: Tips for carers self-care: Content

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Practical support

Seek out practical support

Caring for a person with dementia can be rewarding and challenging. It is important to give yourself permission to reach out and accept help.

Get Support
You don't have to deal with dementia alone. Dementia Australia offers information, advice and support, no matter what your experience of dementia.
Care options
There are many different ways to care for someone with dementia. Learn about your options, and how to explore them.

The Dementia Guide by Dementia Australia
Publication Date: 2024
For people living with dementia, their families and carers. The Dementia Guide is an important resource for any person impacted by any form of dementia, of any age. The Guide contains information about the impact dementia may have on a person, the treatment, support and services they may need.
The 4th edition of this guide is now available to read online, download a pdf, listen to an audio version or request a print copy.
Discrimination and dementia – enough is enough by Dementia Australia
Dementia Action Week Report 2021
For all the increased recognition of human rights over the past decades and the United Nations Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities coming into force, people living with dementia still report experiencing discrimination and not feeling fully included within society. The Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities affirms that all persons with all types of disabilities (including people living with dementia) must enjoy the same rights as everyone else, including rights to autonomy in decision-making, independent living, community inclusion, and liberty. The challenge, however, is to shift attitudes, and design and deliver services, businesses and infrastructure that are flexible, innovative, accessible, appropriate and culturally safe to ensure people with dementia, their families and carers are well supported and included within the Australian community.
When a Family Member Has Dementia - Steps to Becoming a Resilient Caregiver by Susan M. McCurry; Linda Teri (Foreword by)
Publication Date: 2006
Caring for a person with dementia is a difficult and often , overwhelming task. In addition to the inevitable decline in memory and physical function, most people living with dementia develop one or more changed behaviours. These changes can be highly idiosyncratic. No two patients are alike, and interventions that work well with one person are often ineffective with another. Caregivers often become stuck: either unable to figure out how best to help their loved one, or unable to consistently implement positive practices they know would improve their situation. This book offers caregivers a set of practical and flexible tools to enable them become more resilient in the face of difficulty and change.
The 36-Hour Day (7th edition) by Nancy L. Mace; Peter V. Rabins
Publication Date: 2021
For 40 years, The 36-Hour Day has been the leading work in the field for caregivers of those with dementia. Written by experts with decades of experience caring for individuals with memory loss, Alzheimer's, and other dementias, the book is widely known for its authoritativeness and compassionate approach to care. Featuring everything from the causes of dementia to managing its early stages to advice on caring for those in the later stages of the disease.

Emotional support

Seek out emotional support

It is important to find people who are there for you, to listen without judgement and provide support.

National Dementia Helpline
Free and confidential, the National Dementia Helpline provides expert information, advice and support, 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year. No issue too big, no question too small.
Self care for carers
It’s okay to spend time taking care of yourself. Not only because you’ll be better able to care for your loved one, but just because you’re a person who deserves care.
Support for families and carers
Family members and friends often find themselves in the role of a carer when a loved one is living with dementia. While caring for your loved one can be rewarding, it can also have its tougher days. As you care for someone with dementia, you may not be taking as much care of your own emotional, mental or physical wellbeing. Whether you’re the husband, wife, partner, daughter, son, brother, sister or friend of the person, your relationship will change. Dementia Australia offers support for families and carers so you don’t feel alone.

Five Good Minutes : 100 Morning Practices to Help You Stay Calm and Focused All Day Long by Jeffrey Brantley; Wendy Millstine
Publication Date: 2005
The 100 simple practices found in Five Good Minutes® are designed to help even the busiest person start the day right. Using just five minutes of mindfulness, relaxation, or imagery techniques during their morning routines, readers can set their intentions and greet the day feeling calm, centered, and energized.
The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook by Kristin Neff; Christopher Germer
Publication Date: 2018
Are you kinder to others than you are to yourself? This science-based workbook offers a step-by-step approach to breaking free of harsh self-judgments and impossible standards in order to cultivate emotional well-being. It is packed with guided meditations; informal practices to do anytime, anywhere; exercises; and vivid stories of people using the techniques to address relationship stress, weight and body image issues, health concerns, anxiety, and other common problems.
Caring for a Loved One with Dementia by Marguerite Manteau-Rao
Publication Date: 2016
In this book, you'll learn how to approach caring with calm, centered presence; respond to your loved one with compassion; and maintain authentic communication, even in the absence of words. Most importantly, you'll discover ways to manage the grief, anger, depression, and other emotions often associated with dementia care, so you can find strength and meaning in each moment you spend with your loved one.

Be informed

Learn more about dementia to prepare for the future

It’s okay to not know what to do sometimes. Carers do not magically have all the answers.

Learn about dementia
Explore information on types of dementia, living with dementia, and treatment and management.
Library Guide: Future planning and dementia
Explore our library guide on future planning and dementia.

The Dementia Guide by Dementia Australia
Publication Date: 2024
For people living with dementia, their families and carers. The Dementia Guide is an important resource for any person impacted by any form of dementia, of any age. The Guide contains information about the impact dementia may have on a person, the treatment, support and services they may need.
The 4th edition of this guide is now available to read online, download a pdf, listen to an audio version or request a print copy.
A Pocket Guide to Understanding Alzheimer's Disease and Other Dementias by James Warner; Nori Graham
Publication Date: 2018
This pocket guide will help you to better understand Alzheimer's disease or other types of dementia, the conditions, and how they are diagnosed and treated. Written by leading dementia experts, this book provides clear and concise information on symptoms, diagnosis and treatments, getting help and support, tips for people living with dementia and advice for carers
Dementia Home Care How to Prepare Before, During, and After
Publication Date: 2021
Dementia caregivers cope with repetitive questions, mood swings, lost personal space, and live with exhaustion, frustration, and anger. You may not know how to prepare. Dementia Home Care covers skills and tips to help you in your caring role. Including examples of how to create a safe living space, how to use distraction techniques, and suggest available resources for the care giver.
Letting go without giving up : continuing to care for the person with dementia
The idea for Letting go without giving up grew from concerns expressed by carers who felt they were no longer allowed to have a role in caring for the person they had looked after at home after the person entered long-stay care. This booklet is aimed at carers who want to continue their involvement in the lives of the people they have cared for, even if they are no longer responsible for their day-to-day physical care needs.

Take time out

Take time out for things you love to do and the other people you love to spend time with

It is important to find or maintain activities that feel like something you do just for yourself.

Self care for carers
It’s okay to spend time taking care of yourself. Not only because you’ll be better able to care for your loved one, but just because you’re a person who deserves care.

The Complete Guide to Self Care Best Practices for a Healthier and Happier You by Kiki Ely
Publication Date: 2020
The Complete Guide to Self-Care helps you identify your needs so you can relax, refuel, and find calm in your hectic life:
• Setting an effective and fruitful sleep schedule
• Creating exercise routines and not feeling bad about falling off the bike
• Saying no to things you don't want to do (and things that maybe you do but don't have space for)
• Reading, writing, art, music, and all forms of expression that water our soul
• Setting aside time that is only for you, no one else, no exceptions
Just One Thing by Rick Hanson
Publication Date: 2011
Research has shown that integrating little daily practices into your life can actually change the way your brain works.
This guide offers simple things you can do routinely, mainly inside your mind, that will support and increase your sense of security and worth, resilience, effectiveness, well-being, insight, and inner peace. For example, they include: taking in the good, protecting your brain, feeling safer, relaxing anxiety about imperfection, not knowing, enjoying your hands, taking refuge, and filling the hole in your heart. At first glance, you may be tempted to underestimate the power of these seemingly simple practices. But they will gradually change your brain through what's called experience-dependent neuroplasticity.
The Power of Writing It Down by Allison Fallon
Publication Date: 2021-01-12
For anyone who's trying to make sense of their life, who wants to get unstuck from the patterns that hold them back, hear this incredible news: everything you need for the freedom you want is entirely within reach. This practice and pathway is free, it's readily available every day of your life, it takes just minutes of your time, and anyone can do it.
As it turns out, using your words is one of the most powerful means you have for unlocking your life.
• Identify your ruts and create new neurological grooves toward better habits
• Find fresh motivation and take ownership of your life
• Heal from past pain and trauma
• Relieve anxiety and depression
• Contextualize life's setbacks and minor frustrations
• Live a more confident, balanced, and healthy life
Five Good Minutes with the One You Love by Jeffrey Brantley; Wendy Millstine
Publication Date: 2008
When you first fall in love, every moment you spend with that special someone feels like a lifetime. But as time goes by, let's face it, relationships change. It takes practice to remain deeply connected and truly intimate with someone—but it doesn't need to take up all of your free time. With the simple practices in this book, you'll be able to really connect with your special someone in just five minutes a day.

Using simple techniques drawn from mindfulness practice, each of these intimate and fun activities will help you feel closer, more connected, and more deeply in love with your partner. The meditations, affirmations, and observations you'll find here will foster gratitude, trust, empathy, and loving kindness. Use them to get closer to the one you love, and watch as the benefits of mindfulness grow to fill your relationship with renewed romance, harmony, and joy.

Physical health

Finding time for your own physical health

As a carer, making time for regular exercise and physical activity can be tricky. See if you can regularly prioritise gardening, walking together or other little things that help promote an active lifestyle.

Physical health for carers
The same things keep carers healthy that keep everyone healthy: nutrition, exercise, sleep and checking in with your doctor regularly.
Physical exercise
Being active is good for your heart, sleep and mood.
Health direct - How to start exercising
Everyone should aim for at least 30 minutes of moderate-intensity activity on most, preferably all, days of the week. Moderate-intensity physical activity is an activity that is energetic and raises your heart rate, but doesn't make you too breathless, such as fast walking.
Build up slowly...
more...less...
Some physical activity is better than none, and more is better than a little. But you don’t have to exercise to the point of being in pain to get a health benefit.

If you don’t do any physical activity at all, start by just doing some. You can build up gradually.

It can be a good idea to set short-term and long-term goals. Make your goals specific, measurable and achievable. Rather than a vague goal like 'I will get fit', try 'I will walk every day for 10 minutes after meals' or 'I will get on and off the bus/train 2 stops away from my usual stop'.

Workout to Go A Sample Exercise Routine from the National Institute on Aging
Publication Date: 2016
The 13 exercises in this sample workout can help. In this booklet, you'll find easy-to-follow strength, balance, and flexibility exercises that you can do anytime, anywhere.
T'ai Chi for Seniors by Philip Bonifonte
Publication Date: 2004-01-01
This book gives you all the information you need to undertake a safe, health-improving exercise regimen. These ancient Chinese exercises are fun and low impact and help to alleviate the pains of arthritis, fibromyalgia, carpal tunnel syndrome, and many other "senior" diseases. Plus, methods outlined in this guide can be performed standing or seated with no previous experience necessary, and taking into consideration limited range of movement.

Stay safe

Take steps to avoid physical injury when caring for your loved one

If you have to move or lift the person you are caring for, seek advice from your doctor or an allied health professional to reduce your risk of injury.

At Home with Dementia
At Home with Dementia is a free Dementia Australia service that helps you make your home more dementia-friendly. Thus making it more safe for you and the person you care for.

Aging with Agency: Building Resilience, Confronting Challenges, and Navigating Eldercare by Sandi Peters
Publication Date: 2020
Sandi Peters shows us that growing older need not mean the end of personal growth. In fact, late adulthood can prove to be the most meaningful and transformative period of one's life. The key, says Peters, is the development of one's inner life, and with it a shift in one's relation to the aging process.
101 Tips on Staying Safe at Home with Dementia. Avoid Falls, Floods, Injuries, Accidents, Doorstep Crime and More...
Publication Date: 2019
A comprehensive guide for enhancing personal safety and security and making the home safer to live in, if you or a family member has dementia. It also offers insight into creating a home environment that is dementia-aware, building on ability rather than limitation.
With clear information for all readers and straightforward descriptions that eliminate guesswork, this book offers a fast and easy way to help people with dementia to manage their daily lives better and stay safe at home, whether through simple DIY modifications, assistive technology or research-backed strategies.
When Your Aging Parent Needs Help by Leslie Kernisan and Paula Spencer Scott
ISBN: 9781736153215
Publication Date: 2021
It's scary and stressful when it happens . . . noticing changes in your parent and becoming increasingly worried about their health and safety. Full of actionable advice and insider tips, When Your Aging Parent Needs Help provides practical and flexible steps that move concerned families toward effective elder care action, while respecting a parent's dignity and autonomy.
Qigong for Wellbeing in Dementia and Aging by Stephen Rath
Publication Date: 2015
Qigong is the centuries-old practice of moving vital energy (Qi) through the channels of the body, known as meridians, to promote vitality and health. Stephen Rath details current research and Traditional Chinese Medicine theory to show how Qigong practice can support cognitive functioning, as well as emotional and physical wellbeing, in people with dementia.

Ask for help

Talk to friends and family regularly about the type of support you need

As with seeking emotional support, give yourself permission to ask for and accept help when you feel you need it. Try to involve family members, friends and professionals and share responsibilities. This will take some of the pressure off you.

Taking care of a carer
Information on how to support someone who cares for a person with dementia.
Self-care for carers by Dementia Australia
This page discusses the importance of taking a break from caring, how to organise it and who can help. Caring for someone with dementia can be physically and emotionally tiring and stressful. Families and carers can easily become isolated from social contacts, particularly if they are unable to leave the person they are caring for. Regular breaks mean that you can have a rest, go out, attend to business or go on a holiday.
Dementia - Support for Family and Friends by Dave Pulsford; Rachel Thompson
Publication Date: 2012
For friends, family members and carers of people with dementia, understanding the condition and coping with the impact it has on their lives can be extremely challenging. This book, written specifically for these groups, explores each stage of the "journey with dementia" and explains not only how it will affect the person with the condition, but also those around them, and how best to offer support and where to get professional and informal assistance. It focuses on the progressive nature of dementia and the issues that can arise as a result, and gives practical advice that can help to ensure the best possible quality of life both for the person with dementia and the people around them.
Keeping Love Alive As Memories Fade by Gary D. Chapman; Edward G. Shaw; Deborah Barr
Publication Date: 2016
At its heart, this book is about how love gently lifts a corner of dementia’s dark curtain to cultivate an emotional connection amid memory loss. This collaborative work between a healthcare professional, caregiver, and relationship expert will: provide an overview of the love languages and Alzheimer’s disease; correlate the love languages with the developments of the stages of AD; discuss how both the caregiver and care receiver can apply the love languages; address the challenges and stresses of the caregiver journey; and offer personal stories and case studies about maintaining emotional intimacy amidst AD.

Related library guides

Explore our library guides below for further resources and information